The following information is provided by the
by Lynne Kenney Markan, Psy.D
Unresolved conflicts between parents
- Conflict frightens children. When children witness
traumatic events such as fighting or arguing it elicits fear,
panic, and apprehension. Children learn dysfunctional patterns
of relating when they witness arguing and fighting between parents,
particularly when the parents do not successfully come to agreement
at the end of the argument.
- Conflict teaches children to fight. Modeling is a powerful
form of teaching. When children observe their parents fighting,
they learn to be aggressive and controlling.
- Conflict disrupts child development. Children may
get "stuck" in a developmental stage if conflict is
traumatic to them. They may have trouble growing socially or emotionally
when exposed to intense conflict.
- Unresolved conflicts model inappropriate communication,
poor problem-solving, aggressive language and poorly managed expression